Tuesday 7 October 2014

Half Way Review

It has, for sure, been a challenge.  I am only just getting to grips with it all - eating 'properly/sensibly/healthily', thinking better thoughts, exercising and writing a blog daily.  A lot to fit into your days/weeks.  But I now feel it's worth it - I am worth it (as the advert says). 

Life happens regardless of what we eat.  There have been highs and lows of emotions - but they happen regardless of dieting, writing, exercising.  So I can't blame 'food' as a reason for mood swings.

Unsure beginnings of this challenge to diet reminds me of learning to swim, riding a bike, learning to knit, craft and crochet.  I have heard myself say 'I can't do it' so many times during my 60 years that I really must erradicate this statement from my brain.  I know where it comes from.  Besides failing my 11+ exam, when I was at senior school in the third year, my commerce teacher told me I wouldn't get a CSE certificate - I wasn't good enough.  I didn't like the subject or the teacher but hearing that from him I set out to prove him wrong.  I revised hard and passed with a grade 4.  Not brilliant but a 'pass' nevertheless.  I have been proving to myself ever since that 'I can do it' and 'I am good enough' but shifting that unhelpful lump of fat/lie from my brain has taken until this diet to remove. 

I hereby vow to myself to 'bin' those unhelpful and annoying phrases like I binned the 'bad' foods at the start of this challenge.

I now feel in control of what and when I eat whereas pre-challenge eating just happened when and how it did.  I feel lighter in my head more so then in my body - which is weird because there is actually more to think about.  Writing this daily blog has been 'therapy on the go' and regardless of whether it benefits others, it is being very helpful to me.  Getting stuff out of my head onto paper or the computer, frees up space for other thoughts. 

I have more energy too - I want to exercise - walk into town, do the garden, do sit ups.  A weird transformation of mind has happened but there is still a nagging negative voice saying 'ahhh but will you keep it up?'  It's a daft question really because did I keep up riding a bike, crocheting, dressmaking?  No, but I CAN DO IT if I choose to.  Every day is a choice of a hundred things - what to wear, eat, do with the time etc.  Somethings we do automatically without thought.  I would like healthy lifestyle choices to become automatic but I guess that may take longer than 60 days, now that 30 have already gone.

I no longer experience hunger as I did at the beginning which is good.  At least when I get the first pang I know what to eat - usually a breakfast bar, two rice cakes with spread on, a piece of fruit or munch on a carrot or pick at sugar snap peas.  Long gone are the days when I would have a Kit-Kat, Bounty bar or Flake in the office drawer which was a daily habit for elevenses.

Having picked and frozen the blackberries they are, as yet, untouched.  I plan to do a SW breakfast with them - yoghurt, oats and berries in the fridge overnight, to hand to eat in the morning, but can't get to grips in my head to eat oats cold.  I like porrige oats hot!  But I will try to overcome this hurdle of brain power one day soon!

So to score myself out of 10, I think I am a 6 or 7.  I had a booster last night as I cooked SW Diet Cola chicken for the family.  The ALL enjoyed it and complimented me.  I will definately be making it again.  Now I must get on with the next 30 days of the challenge and enjoy it.

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