59 day challenge

Day one was, as predicted, hard. Not having prepared properly and still tired from partying at the weekend are my excuses, but I wonder if I really want to do this challenge I have set myself and why? Negative thoughts abound in my head - 'life's too short to diet', 'I can't do this' (which is common for me when I try anything new), 'aahhh I don't want to be thinking of food all day/watching what I'm eating'.

I did in fact do OK.  I was soooo hungry in the morning (my body was recovering from the assault of tension and laughing so much that my appetite came back with a vengeance) that I wanted to grab the first thing I could think of and gobble it down.  My usual habit is a quick bowl of cereal.  Having grabbed the cereal bowl aware of the empty pit feeling I had to then stop and think about the right choice.  The hightenened awareness of 'starving' made me hurry up gathering yoghurt, strawberries and oats.  I didn't enjoy it and was still hungry.  That 'starving' feeling was a bit scary as thoughts of fainting/passing out/falling over whispered in my brain.

A rushed visit to the loo followed (sorry about the detail!) and I expelled all the tension/crap of the weekend's rollercoaster of emotions.  I had experienced both joy and sorrow, laughter and tears.  I had become anxious about the party, I had wanted to cancel it and just cry for my friends' bad news.  But I went ahead and was surrounded by more friends, angels with skin on.  It was fab.

I then became hungry again but had pleasant thoughts about getting myself a boiled egg.  Ooohh it was scrummy, really enjoyed it.  I had a day off work to be able to pander to my body's needs.  How do people diet, work, run a home, exercises, sleep well, play etc all at the same time?

A trip out to a coffee shop had me preparing what I would have, having looked at the dieting regulations/paperwork.  A glass of milk and a toasted teacake was what I wanted but my friend wanted to treat me to lunch so we both had scampi and chips! Having 'blown' it I then had a gluten free coconut macaroon with a chocolate base! How easy it was to be thrown off course!

I was with a dieting expert who confidently knew the differences between two dieting plans and I wondered if I had chosen the right one? Perhaps counting points would be easier.  My brain doing another trick to confuse me and make me fail. I had a big plate of salad for tea and loved it.  No snacking today necessary.  So onwards with what I have set myself to do......